Julian
You gave me some tea and it tasted like shit.
Honestly, I’d rather have been bit.
but your smile was charming, alarmingly so.
Too bad your innards are melting the snow.
Kenny the Killer
Your story was boring and so were you,
although as you continued my interest grew.
I took my meat right out of your mouth,
cause how hard was it to drive further south?
Marian
You looked far too eager to hold my spear
but what can I say, it was your eyes my dear.
The way you gestured, my shaft in your hand.
It couldn’t have gone better than planned.
Terry
You clung in the room like a rat in the walls,
but watched as Marian uncovered my balls.
I could be misled but was there thirst in your eye?
Or shocked one could have as much meat as I?
Conti
My one, my only, my magnificent guide,
took me by the hand and held it with pride.
Took turns in the forest thrusting a deer,
then did the same when another drew near.
You might be afraid I’m making you gay,
but you had no choice; nature made you that way.
Darmer
All I wanted was a carton of smokes,
but your smelly ass kept talking to folks.
Sitting over there with all them chicks.
Sorry, but I doubt your genes will mix.
Rook
Swords are for characters from fantasy books,
it’s no wonder you like them, considering your looks.
I bet you felt good while looking a fool,
Just like you did on the short bus to school.
Juniper
Weirdest girl this side of Monroe,
It’s cold as shit and she dressed like a ho.
It’s okay if your thoughts are a little belated,
Is it cause your parents are related?
Lorelai
Clearly a product of drunk fornication.
A true testament to the state of the nation.
You should know that I can get it up,
but I’d rather not have to piss in a cup.
